Archive

Posts Tagged ‘Things out of my comprehension’

Some reflections on Arendt, Part I

March 20, 2009 obliviousjjl Leave a comment

After finished reading ‘”What Remains? The Language Remains”: A Conversation with Günter Gaus’, I have had much self reflections going on in my mind. I have always been fascinated by Hannah Arendt; she was such a brilliant thinker, and what I love most is how beautifully and simply she explains such complex theories in a way bereft of flowery, extra diction. Simple, yet profound.

One of the qualities of her writing that I found particularly striking when I first read Arendt is her use of masculine pronouns. For some feminists (I venture to say “many”, but won’t be able to qualify with empirical proof, so I chose “some” instead), using “him” or “he” or “men” in place of “humans” is sexist and degrading to women. While I acknowledge and understand perfectly well the problems with using sexist language, personally, I think that one ought not to get too caught up or too offended; after all, words carry meaning because humans collectively impose certain concepts and thereby carry certain connotations. In some languages, like Chinese and Latin, there is no sex distinction between “him” or “her” or “human”. So I find this fascinating because Arendt reminds me of another female thinker, Rosa Luxemberg (socialist thinker and revolutionary). The link: while both being female in a male-dominated society, not only do they use the same so-called sexist language using “men” while referring to both men and women, humans in general, not only were they not bothered by the distinctions imposed and categorised by both men and women, in their intellectual spheres their voices are ostensibly rather “masculine” (i.e. powerful, influential). And yet, on a private level, they can also be considered quite “feminine” (i.e. nurturing, loving caring). While concerned with affairs dominated largely by men, they did not renounce the traditional, old values of women, e.g. being a wife, mother, daughter, ad infinitum. In other words, depending where they are and what is needed of them, they simply assume their roles and responsibilities without complaint and resistance. Now, whether or not these roles and responsibilities is “forced” upon them by society is another matter, one which I do not wish to take up now because I believe that the matter is not that simple, and neither is it something I find – personally – particularly relevant. 

Quoting from Arendt’s response to Gaus about the question of women’s emancipation: “there is always the problem as such. I have actually been rather old-fashioned. I always thought that there are certain occupations that are improper for women, that do not become them, if I may put it that way. It just doesn’t look good when a woman gives orders. She should try not to get into such a situation if she wants to remain feminine. Whether I am right about this or not I do not know. I myself have always lived in accordance with this more ore less unconsciously–or let us rather say, more or less consciously. The problem itself played no role for me personally. To put it very simply, I have always done what I liked to do.” I don’t think she was ever really concerned with the problem at all. And when Gaus inquired the purpose of Arendt’s writing was to invoke influence, she replied that that question itself was framed in very masculine terms, i.e. the need to be influential, powerful. 

I sympathise. I really do. 

I think in them, I’ve found the reason why I’m not particularly moved by feminist theory and their claims. By all due respect, it is not that I find feminist theory to be ridiculous or irrelevant. On the contrary, I think they are valid claims and need to be taken seriously. On a personal level, however, I find it interesting, but believe there are other things that strike me just as (if not more) interesting. 

I mean, I am a woman, and I am also Asian (double plus the minority level). If I am working, I do my duties required of me to the best of my ability. I take orders and if needed I give orders. If I have to, I can discuss feminism, and I can also take their side. But at home, I likewise resume my duties, call it housewife or not, which include but is not limited to, cleaning, cooking, be a loving mother and wife. I rarely take my philophising into our home. One of the reasons, of course, is because Mr. Worm (for those of you who know him) isn’t exactly the perfect interlocutor for a philosopher. To simplify my reasons, it might just be because I like to keep private and public matters separate. That is not to say I don’t philosophize at home; I do. 

Perhaps part of the reason as to why I’m a bit indifferent (though indifferent might be too strong a word) to sexism or racism is because I’ve never really experienced such phenomenon. I am not oblivious to it, because when it happens around me, I am aware of it. But as of today, I haven’t been personally affected. I hope I am not offending any adamant feminist out there, and if I have, please don’t take it too personally, as I have nothing against feminists or feminism per se. 

I think there is also a deeper aspect as to why women like Arendt refrain from using any sort of antifeminist or feminist diction. Whether you use it or blatantly attack those who use it, it seems you are still caught within that dialectic. One could also argue that refusing to use that kind of language is also a kind of feminism. But I would venture that while this is true, on the other hand, it can also simply mean one does not wish to partake in distinguishing a woman for her sexuality. Either way still means that you are caught in that opposition. What does it really mean to address woman as woman? Why not woman as simply human, just as man is simply human? Arendt would have never wanted people to recognize her as, say, the Jew who had an affair with Heidegger–neither as a woman, as a Jew, or as a philosopher. Rather, I think, simply as Hannah Arendt. That is, Arendt as one distinguished by her thinkings and what she deemed as important; Arendt in her own right, not as Arendt attached to something/one else. 

“I have never in my life “loved” any people or collective group, neither the German people, the French, the Americans, not he working class or anything of that sort. I indeed love only my friends, and the only kind of love I know of and believe in is the love of [particular] persons. Moreover, this “love of the Jews” would appear to me, since I am myself Jewish, as something rather suspect.” This was in her response to Gershom Scholem, who accused her as an intellectual from the German Left and as a Jewish unaware of the “Jewish problem”. For those of you interested, I recommend reading first some biographical background on Arendt, and her controversial report Eichmann in Jerusalem. So as I was saying, I believe there is something quite profound in this statement of hers. The more I think about it, the more I think that she is right in pointing out the practical impossibility of a true love for a group/collective of people… at least for me. Who knows? Many there are some out there who, like Jesus, love people. I just find that kind of love too abstract. Admittedly, I am not a person of such profound integrity. If anyone knows of such a person, consider yourself one-in-a-million lucky.

“The Economy of Friendship” – how I experience it.

October 13, 2008 obliviousjjl Leave a comment

What it all comes down to is really money.

No words can describe the disappointment and sadness that overcame me when I found out that the friend whom I first befriended when arriving here in Pittsburgh alone has decided that because of a life decision – my own life decision which doesn’t concern her – she can no longer talk to me, and that we can no longer be friends. This is someone that I once thought, if only because we’ve been seriously together almost everyday of the school year, would be a friend for life. I had already been able to picture her in my future milestones: Ph.D graduation ceremony, wedding ceremony, first baby… etc. Sure, we’ve really only known each other for about a year and a few months, but when we actually live together, a year really feels like two or three. I’ve always believed that you can’t trust the depth of a relationship by time. Some people click together immediately, and while the relationship has only been, say, three months, it may already feel as if you’ve known each other for a lifetime. I can’t say that this was precisely how I felt towards her, but it was pretty close. Sure, we have our differences, and sure, at times they clash, but I had been so sure that we could be relatively open with whatever was on our minds, and even if we had differences, our care for each other would motivate and keep open a channel of communication.

Apparently, I was the only one who felt this way.

A couple days ago, after having been given the cold shoulder for a good 6-7 weeks, I finally found out that the point of departure had to do with money. What is even more ludicrous, is that this unrest over money, at least in my point of view, really had to do with miscommunication: there were parts she didn’t understand, and instead of asking me for clarification, simply assumed the worst case scenario. When I got fed up and confronted her, she said,

How can I trust you? How can I trust that you will continue to pay? I know you want to pay, but you said that financially it will be difficult. So how can I know for sure that you won’t just leave and leave everything behind? How can I trust you?

That hit me like a thousand knives aimed directly at my heart. I could hardly believe my ears. I replied, as calmly as I could,

I can’t make you trust me. Trust is something that has to come directly from inside of you, from you own accord. I can’t force you to feel something you don’t. How long have you known me? How often has something like this happened? This is the first time [and frankly, I don't even think it counts, because I have continued to pay]. I really do expect so much more from you. What you just said about not trusting me, is really, really disappointing.

And yet, she continued to insist, implicitly, that I give her some sort of “thing” (tacit, I suppose that’s what she meant) that would guarantee I pay up my dues. Which made it even more disappointing for me. As if that was not enough knives to be stabbed with, she continued,

I don’t want to tell you this, but you ruined my life. You can just pick up everything and leave [without fulfilling your responsibilities]. I don’t want to talk to you, because you are going to leave anyways. So there’s no point.

I ruined her life?!

Wtf. Honestly, from what I’ve been hearing, and from her attitude, I can hardly believe that I, the Jennifer whom she cannot trust, would have such an impact on her life. Even if what she was talking about was money, have I not already explained – and emphasized many times too! – that I would continue to pay my rent even after I leave? Even if it means getting into an argument with Mr. Worm or begging my parents? Has she ever even thought about if it was someone else in my position, would that someone else continue to try to pay up dues even after having been treated like an outcast in her own home? If I continue to pay my rent even after moving out, it is really no longer out of obligation, but rather out of courtesy, out of the sheer fact that I treat her like a friend. If it was anybody else, who the hell cares if I’ve ruined your life? I leave, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

And what does she mean, “I don’t want to talk to you, because you are going to leave anyways”? So she is not planning to continue this friendship? All because of what? Because of a little misunderstanding on money?

If you don’t want to be friends with me anymore in the future, that’s your choice, and I respect that. But so long as I am here, you need to tell me these things. Because if i didn’t initiate this conversation, you probably wouldn’t even bring it up even after I leave. You can’t run away from problems and just ignore them. If you don’t try to solve them, they won’t go away, and the problems will always be there. If you have anything that you are unhappy about, you need to tell me. It’s only fair. You can stay mad at me, but at least tell me why you are mad. If you don’t tell me, I don’t know, and it will never go away.

It was so upsetting for me. It drew a few tears out of her, but honestly, for some reason, it did not move me at all.

I know money is a big issue for her. Which is why there are many times that I just paid for our expenses. I would treat her to coffee, pay for her meals every once in a while, and when she told me that she couldn’t pay rent on time, I would pay for the full amount first and have her pay me back later. I think I am a very generous person, and I think I have been really nice to her.

Apparently, all these little things that I have done for her, she has remained oblivious to. I don’t expect her to repay me, but at least a show of some appreciation is standard, and is really all that I ask for. Ostensibly, I have already asked for too much. If she can’t trust me, I’m sorry, I can’t be the same way to her as I have always been.

I know that you can’t expect every so-called “friend” you meet to become best friends forever. But at the very minimal, during the times we share together, at least show some respect, appreciation, and understanding. Is this too naive of me?

It is indeed true that in times of hardship your true friends will show. Real friends will stick by especially when things are going rough.

I am just sorry to know that she isn’t one of them.

Protected: 退後

September 14, 2008 obliviousjjl Enter your password to view comments

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:


Protected: Can you keep a secret?

August 27, 2008 obliviousjjl Enter your password to view comments

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:


The Quest for Life

25 May 2008
Phoenix landed safely! Congrats to the entire NASA team!!!
24 May 2008
On this coming Monday, NASA’s space probe Phoenix is scheduled to land on Mars, further north than previous missions in order to collect samples for traces of water (which means traces of life). I am no scientist–not even close–but I do appreciate the geniuses of our nation (and of course those around the world) who contribute to these sorts of massive think tanks, making space exploration (among many others) possible. You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to think this stuff is pretty awesome. I was watching this video clip of how Phoenix must land safely for a successful mission posted up on the BBC News web-page, and my jaw just dropped on my table. It was absolutely AWESOME and SPECTACULAR! I mean, if you just watch all the technology inherent in Phoenix…….. it is just *mind boggling*! SO RAD! Look at how cool (and kinda cute, too ^-^) this thing looks:

Seriously, for those of you who have not seen it, you must check out the video on BBC (I’ve provided the link above), and don’t trust any of my primitive descriptions of Phoenix.
On a more philosophical level, I just remember something Hannah Arendt had written in one of her essays (well, she’s said this in many essays, but I like this one the best, and it’s one that I’m most familiar with) where she reflects about the many new beginnings that humans can create:
“In 1957, an earth-born object made by man was launched into the universe, where for some weeks it circled the earth according to the same laws of gravitation that swing and keep in motion the celestial bodies–the sun, the moon, and the stars. To be sure, the man-made satellite was no moon or star, no heavenly body which could follow its circling path for a time plan that to us mortals, bound by earthly time, lasts from eternity to eternity. Yet, for a time, it managed to stay in the skies; it dwelt and moved in the proximity of the heavenly bodies as though it had been admitted to their sublime company.”
                                                                                         ~From the Prologue to The Human Condition
The importance of this event, “second to no other”, is not from the human capacity of wonder or power, but rather because it was a sign of human rebellion against existence, a need to escape from the prisons of earth. And then, she talks about how this has to do with the artificiality of life. Humans create objects, and these artifacts that remain on the earth after our death signal an immortality even after we have ceased to be.